As I awake my eyes fall on the wheelchair that is at the foot of the bed...oh yes;  for just a very brief moment I have forgotten... the chair belongs to me.

 

My mind wonders back to the events that have shaped what is now my life. People tell me I should write a book about it due to the outrageous and almost unbelieveable events that took  place. Could such  injustice and downright cruelty happen to a person...how do I  begin; where do I start...then I remember the caregiver...the women who was suppose to be taking care of me after the surgery that had rendered me in the wheelchair.

 

 It was suppose to be only temporary; once the back infection that had shocked my back cleared I would get back on my feet... then I feel the sting of her open hand across my face and I am helpless. I look up... she keeps hitting me as I lay in the bed.   I'm crying, I have my arms up to deflect the punches. I don't know how I know to block the punches so well...you see I have amnesia. No one knows I have amnesia because the doctors say I  have Alzheimer's...outrageious I know...a 55 year old outer island female whose very own doctors when questioned on my mental conditon told the doctors at Queen's that I was in good mental health. 

 

She stops hiitting me and starts to put duct tape on the diaper I have on, she's encircling my waist with the tape. Why do I  have a diaper on? I am completely continent but no one believes me. You see in the hospital it was easier for the  nurses to put me in a diaper then to toilet me... but we'll get to that.

 

 All of a sudden the caregiver is at my bedside...she's holding the phone and telling me it's my mother...my mother? I take the phone and I  hear my name and suddenly my memories start surging back. I have continuous mental images for 2 second intervals and it's my life. My memory is coming back like choppy short videos! My mother's voice was the trigger but now it's 2 videos as I glance up and see the caregiver... In my mind one side are the memories that my mother's voice is bringing up and the other side are memories of the caregiver who is standing directly over me...images of her stuffing stool soaked rags down my throat, the hitting, the...I don't feel so good and I am coming to a stark realalization that I'm  in  real trouble. You see... I'm an RN and realize I am in grave danger. There is a psychotic caregiver standing over me... I'm  her private pay meal ticket. This is not good.

 

 I can't let her know I have regained all my memory.  To say I was in fear for my life would be an understatement. I end the  call and the caregiver casually asks me how much of my memory has come back.

Views: 29

Tags: amnesia

Comment

You need to be a member of Hawai'i Actors Network to add comments!

Join Hawai'i Actors Network

Comment by Sharon P Garcia on April 25, 2012 at 11:29am

"Crawling Back From Amnesia""What is the date again?"...I stall as I try to think of what to say. Then I look  her straight in the eye and say that my last memory was of being in the hospital; after that everythings a blank. She looks relieved and leaves.

When she comes back she has a bunch of pills in a medicine cup. She starts to pour them down my mouth and I say "Stop." Then I remember she doesn't let me do anything myself. It's faster for her to shove all the stuff down my throat...including the food. I realize she can't tell me what the pills are because she doesn't know which are which. There are as many as 15 pills from what I can see.

She's visibly agitated and I comply as she pours the pills into my mouth and then puts a cup with a straw in reach but insists on holding the cup.

Thoughts are surging through my mind...how do I get out of here, who can I call? My mother is on the mainland taking care of her sick husband, the RN who comes monthly isn't going to help me. Anything I tell the RN will get back to the caregiver. If I call the police all the caregiver has to do is show them the diagnosis from the hosptial that I'm demented and need to be institusionlized for the rest of my life...yes; the doctor from Queen's actually wrote in my chart that my prognosis was so bad that I would never recover mentally. The exact writing is permanent & overwhelming.

Suddenly (as will happen often) a memory pops into my mind. I'm laying on the floor beside the bed, there is great pain. I tried to escape and went down on the floor with my legs under me. I'm too weak to straighten myself out. My plan was to drag myself out to the street to get help. I'm screaming call 911, somebody help me please. I'm so  weak I can't even drag myself a few feet, I look down and see my ribs sticking out so far as if I'm a human skeleton. I scream for what seems like hours. It's night as signaled by the window in my room. No one comes... then the sun starts to come up and I hear the front door  open (I can hear everything that goes on in the house).

It's her...she's been out all night clubbing.  In a few moments I hear the door knob to my room turn as I silently pray for God to take me...somehow I'm all too familiar with the psychotic rage that will soon be upon me.

 

Welcome to Hawaii Actors Network. The fruit of Hawaii's Film Industry ~ HawaiiScreenActors.com talent@hawaiifilmindustry.com

Casting on HAN

HAN guitar picks coming soon.


@hawaiifilmindustry

Trending In Hawaii's Film Industry

Loading…
  • Add Photos
  • View All

Hawaii Film Industry Social Connections

   Hawaii Film Industry Social Media Connections

Hawaii Community Media

                     WATCH LIVE STREAM

'Olelo's on demand digital channel 52 on Oceanic Time Warner Cable was launched just a few months ago and we're adding new shows to it daily. Check it out and watch what you want...when you want.

Posted by 'Ōlelo Community Media on Monday, April 4, 2016

'Olelo Community Media

Join Us In Celebrating National Volunteer Week On April 21st-27th

“Volunteerism is the voice of the people put into action. These actions shape and mold the present into a future of which we can all be proud.”  ~ Helen Dyer Volunteerism is what ‘Ōlelo Community Media is built upon. For nearly 24 years,  ‘Ōlelo Volunteers have dedicated thousands of hours assisting with community production work, mentoring […]

Youth Xchange Marathon: A New Record, 658 YXC Entries Premiering This Weekend

Gather your students, get your popcorn, sit down and be prepared to be entertained by this year’s ‘Olelo Youth Xchange Video Competition’s  658 amazing entries presented by Sony.  The time will fly by as the students demonstrate their creativity and express their views of the issues facing our state. This year’s record number of entries, […]

‘Olelo Kaimuki Community Media Center Grand Opening

Come see our newest community media center (cmc) at Kaimuki High School on Wednesday, February 27th. This cmc replaces ‘Olelo’s facility at Jarrett Middle School and represents an exciting new partnership with Kaimuki High School and DOE TeleSchool Branch. We hope you can join us in celebrating this new chapter in our service to Oahu […]

Mayoral Inauguration LIVE on ‘Olelo, January 2nd at 10am

‘Olelo Community Media will cablecast the historic joint inauguration of incoming Mayor Kirk Caldwell and newly elected Honolulu City Council members Ikaika Anderson, Ann Kobayashi, Ron Menor, Kymberly Pine and Joey Manahan on Wednesday, January 2nd. The one-hour ceremony will air live on ‘Olelo Channel O‘AHU 55 starting at 10 a.m. It will also be […]

REMEMBRANCE CEREMONY FOR SENATOR DANIEL K. INOUYE ON ‘OLELONET

‘Ōlelo Community Media will cablecast LIVE the public viewing of Senator Daniel K. Inouye as he lies in state at the State Capitol on Saturday, Dec. 22 from 5pm through midnight. According to Governor Abercrombie, at the request of the late Senator Inouye’s family, the cablecast will be aired without commentary. TV Broadcast: Saturday Dec. […]

Hawai Film Industry Pinterest

Hawaii has amazing t

Hawaii has amazing talent.

#BlacTikis Perfect f

#BlacTikis Perfect for sets around the world. One of the kind Comedy and Tragedy BLAC TIKI's and Hawaii Film Industry Mug. Film makers, don't miss out.

#BlacTikis Perfect f

#BlacTikis Perfect for sets around the world. One of the kind Comedy and Tragedy BLAC TIKI's and Hawaii Film Industry Mug. Film makers, don't miss out.

#BlacTikis Perfect f

#BlacTikis Perfect for sets around the world. One of the kind Comedy and Tragedy BLAC TIKI's and Hawaii Film Industry Mug. Film makers, don't miss out.

In Hawaii | Search *

In Hawaii | Search *Mugs* on Facebook Market Place. PayPal info@hawaiiactors... instagram.com/p/BEVM9tENlNj/

Tweet Hawaii Actors

Life Class / Join in on the conversation #lifeclass

Happening Now in Hawaii's Film Industry

#HawaiiFilmIndustry


Blog Posts

Sharon M. Bell Plays Shioma's Mole on Hawaii Five-O

Posted by Sharon M. Bell on May 18, 2016 at 5:00pm 0 Comments

Hawaii Five-O Season 6 Episode 24 was action packed and part of the 2 hour season finale on May 13th, 2016. Did you miss it?  

Check out the clip that Sharon Co-Starred in her Actor Reel here but be sure to go to…

Continue

Affinity Models has Hawaii Promo Model Jobs in April and June

Posted by Ross Grossman on April 13, 2016 at 6:53pm 0 Comments

Thought you or someone you know might want this part time contract work for live event Brand Ambassador/Promo Model work...

Because you live in the area, I thought you or someone you know might want to work at one of our live event…

Continue

THE ACTORS WORKSHOP

Posted by Louie Boria on April 5, 2016 at 1:02pm 1 Comment

THE ACTORS WORKSHOP  

    Directed by WAYNE WARD, SAG/AFTRA   

808-375-1493…

Continue

Sharon M. Bell - Lands a Day Role on a Lifetime Channel Movie - Starring Antonio Sabato Jr. and Boti Bliss

Posted by Sharon M. Bell on February 22, 2016 at 9:30am 1 Comment

I was so honored to have been casted in a Day Role on a Lifetime Channel Movie.  The cast and crew from LA were so awesome to work with.  I can't thank Mike and his awesome crew enough for the opportunity to work on such a professional set.…

Continue

Congrats To David Mattew Jenkins

Posted by Michael Snoopy Wells on February 20, 2016 at 9:33am 1 Comment

Actor David Matthew Jenkins is costarring as
the Race Photographer in Wiener Dog Internationals http://www.imdb.com/title/tt3462880/?ref_=ttmd_md_nm

New Hawaii Event Calendar

Posted by Eagle Strayhorn on February 19, 2016 at 2:39am 0 Comments

Aloha,

We just launched a new Hawaii event calendar and it’s free and easy to use. If you have an event coming up, please feel free to add…

Continue

Film Daily

Hot Docs: Blue Ice Group Documentary Fund

Hot Docs: Blue Ice Group Documentary Fund
Deadline: 1 December

The $1-million Hot Docs-Blue Ice Group Documentary Fund helps enable more African documentary filmmakers to tell their own stories and contribute to a new generation of the African documentary community.

National Film Board of Canada Filmmaker Assistance Program

National Film Board of Canada Filmmaker Assistance Program
Deadline: 3 December

The National Film Board’s mandate is to reflect Canadian values and perspectives through the production and distribution of innovative Canadian audiovisual works accessible in relevant media of today.

The Independent Filmmaker Project

The Independent Filmmaker Project
Deadline: 30 November

IFP’s Fiscal Sponsorship program focuses exclusively on documentary films and other works of nonfiction, short films and low-budget fiction/narrative features (50 minutes+).

Gucci Tribeca Documentary Fund

Gucci Tribeca Documentary Fund
Deadline: 9 December

As mainstream media moves away from in-depth coverage of domestic and global social issues, documentaries have become an important and much needed tool to draw attention to these contemporary international conflicts.

San Francisco Film Society Filmmaking Grant

San Francisco Film Society Filmmaking Grant
Deadline: 6 December

The SFFS / KRF Filmmaking Grant supports feature narrative films that through plot, character, theme or setting explore human and civil rights, antidiscrimination, gender and sexual identity and other social issues of our time. This is NOT a documentary grant.

© 2016   Created by Hawaii Film Industry.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service

Offline

Live Video

HTML Codes